I can't help but be addicted to your Love....

To all the guys & gals who feel worthless,
who look into the mirror
& don't like what they see.
Who cut or starve or pretend to be someone
they can't be.
You may think yourselves ugly
& deserving of all this pain....
But to me you are Beautiful,
and should be treated just the same
as any of us
who don't know your pain.
You deserve to be free
from suffering.
You deserve a life
of Love.
So come here,
beautiful stranger;
here's a kiss
& a hug. <3

....you're in Christian Club & someone asks you what Church you go to, & you're all like, "Uhhh....I don't go to Church....".

Yeah....That's my life. :P

As an explanation of why I don't go to church:

My Parents stopped going before I was born, so they never took me. And my Grandmother no longer attends, so....she didn't take me. And I don't like to hang with my friends when I'm out of school, so....they couldn't take me.

And....

I'm just afraid to go. I don't know what to wear, what to do, ect. I'm also fearful because I wouldn't be as Religiously-Educated as everyone else is. >.<'

*Sigh*....I don't know. Maybe one day?

This started out as a Response to 15_Minute_Fic, but, er,....I wanted to expand the poem more & went over the Time Limit. ^^;

Oh well!

Edited Version can be Found Here: http://fadingangel213.deviantart.com/#/d4i4evp

Prompt: Study.

When I was younger
I never put much thought
into the actions of man,
of what he does and what he wants.

I never bothered to listen
to the bitter remarks
that covered up
a weakening voice
(and heart).

How did I not see,
not know,
that they cry at night
when all alone?

I never noticed the way they fumble
with unexperienced hands
on buttons clasped,
peaking the evergrowing curiosity.

Or the way he timidly
asked to dance
using no words
- just hands and tongues
and silence, deafening still.

Or the way his shadow
would walk behind him
- a constant reminder
and how he would stop
and listen
as if expecting it to laugh
and mock him.

Or the silence in which he sat
in the night
tormented,
but calm
as he sipped at his tea
and picked up a book
that was never to be read.

And I never noticed
any of this
in all my years
through all my tears

Until I tore back the layers
and analyzed the specimen
to find that his heart was just like mine
though the state different.

I studied it
with an evergrowing pain....
the object in my hands-
oh I would never be the same.

It spoke through it's broken appearance;
more than just shattered veins.
It still beats with a stubbornness
that can never be tamed.

I can't explain
what it is I felt
when I realized
the truth.

But this I've found,
written in my notes-
man is monster,
but he is an angel
-strong,
made of sweetness
that showers the dark with light.

Man is fool,
but his wisedom knows the truth.
He smiles
while he lies

And he kisses
when he wants to bite.
But this I've learned
in all my studies:

Man is stronger
- he must conceal the misery.
Man is kinder
- he tries so hard to protect.

He hides
not behind a mask,
but inside of himself.
And not because of fear

he's just waiting
for the time
when they can love him
for who he is.
Completly.

He lives in a cage
because that's the last place
one is safe
if one has
broken wings.

And who am I
to hate him,
to crush this fragile bird
beneath my shoe?

This body,
this lifeless shell....
this is man.

I pity him still....

So everything was going fine & dandy yesterday. Just got finished w/ 3 tests and a bunch of other random stuff that you do at school....So I come walking out at 12:30 (since it was a Minimum Day), dying for Lunch, & I get into the car w/ my grandmother. So, we're just sitting there waiting for the traffic to clearout when I reach up to scratch my nose....

I when I take my hand away, I discover that a bunch of blood had leaked on to it. Then I notice that I have blood on my shirt. :P So, I'm forced to hold a kleenex to my nose for several minutes while leaning my head back.... which of course causes the blood to slide down my throat (which already has a glob of mucus stuck in it).

....So, then I wind up hacking up a big glob of Mucus mixed w/ blood. So Fun!/Sarcasm.

All Better, right?

WRONG!

About 4 hrs. later I get another Nosebleed while on the Computer....

At least that one wasn't as bad as the first, though. ;P

So, last night my Grandmother & I go to "Mimi's Cafe", and we're looking at the menu, and I'm looking at the soup section [trying to figure out if I'm in the mood for Soup] & then I spot the words "Soup du Jour"....

So, then I was like, 'I wonder what that is?' So, I ask my Grandmother to see if she knows & she stops for a second, then says....

"It means soup of the day....you should know that." (Or something along those lines.)
....

I did an inner facepalm.


I'm in my 2nd year of French! I should remember something so easy by now! >.< Urg! Stupid Memory.... :P

_---_ IF YOUR LIFE WAS A MOVIE, WHAT WOULD THE SOUNDTRACK BE? _---_

*~* RULES *~*
[1] Get out / open your music player (iPod, MP3 Player, etc.) / music library (iTunes, Winamp, Media Player etc.).
[2] Put it on shuffle.
[3] Press forward / the next button for each theme.
[4] Use the song title as the answer to each theme, even if it doesn't make sense.
[5] Bold the theme (Opening Credits, Waking Up, etc.), italicize the answers, and give your own comments in the parenthesis on how it relates to the prompt.
[6] Tag 10 people.
[7] DON'T SKIP SONGS OR LIE!

.::. Opening Credits .::.

Handlebars. (Oh, yeah! Great Song!....And it proves that I can do anything that I put my mind to! ^_^ Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6DauoiJ7rSI)

.::. Your Theme .::.

Crying. (Accurate Song at Times. :P Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgFA6OWdAYE)

.::. Waking Up .::.

Missing. (It would be quite depressing to wake up to this each day. :( Lin to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Tx2gK3vmRA)
.::. School .::.

Fake It. (Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pj5z50FukdQ)

.::. Home .::.

A Little Less Talk & A Lot More Action. (Uhhh....No Comment. O.o' Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgKWj5D9Bx0)

.::. Falling In Love .::.

All the Things She Said. (Perfect Song for someone else, but....not for me. :P Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ebPvxUvzEbs)

.::. Boyfriend / Girlfriend's Theme .::.

Lithium. (Well, first off, I don't have a Boyfriend. Second....I would feel sorry for him if this Song fit him. :( Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8LtXJXbiLo)

.::. First Kiss .::.

In Pieces. (Uhhh....Complicated relationship, much? :P That first Kiss must have been a Death Sentence.... Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0F_MTozawrc)

.::. Hanging With Friends .::.

Pat-A-Pan. (That sounds like a Fun Group of Friends! :D Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrkq2KSP6KI)

.::. Best Friend's Theme .::.

White & Nerdy. (I-I....I just don't know what to say. None of my friend's really fit this. :P Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JZjBZQPhEnE)

.::. Fight With Parents .::.

Youth of the Nation. (This song makes you regret that fight with your parents. :( Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lI_YSFjhgY)

.::. By Yourself at Home .::.

Let's Watch it Burn (A.K.A. City). (I'm not a Psychotic Arsonist Murderer, I swear!....Maybe.... Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VGGH9lXwg1Q)

.::. Break Up .::.

Hello. (Fitting....Since it's such a Lonely Song. Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GfBenJfeF7c)

.::. Depression .::.

We Are. (Makes you feel guilty, don't it? :P This song has always reminded me of the Holocaust.... Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a24vKoYROxk)

.::. Drunk .::.

Piece of Me. (If I were Drunk & had a Kid....this might be a Great Song for me! ;D Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E7d4qaPZQwU)

.::. Driving .::.

Pony. (....No Comment. O.o' Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hgPwx0DjrWw)

.::. Coming Down (Hangover) .::.

Break Me. Shake Me. (Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dEVo5zSMp3Y)

.::. Regret .::.

Behind these Hazel Eyes. (Good Song for this Theme. ^_^ Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dicb2NFI36s)

.::. New Love .::.

Somewhere I Belong. (Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4ZI8AC4AR5A)

.::. Prom .::.

Headstrong. (I don't think I'll get many people to dance with me. :P Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9my_WxAaJy8)

.::. Prom speech .::.

One More Night. (Suggestive, Much? O.o' Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IXFVOv8obBQ)

.::. Graduation .::.

Un Monde Parfait. (Awkward Graduation.... O.O' Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8p0BxMykqg)

.::. Graduation Speech .::.

Americano. (That's Right! Have Pride in our Country & our ways! :D Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AVXj0n0xNv4)

.::. College .::.

Fix You. (Why so Depressing for College?! D: Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PrrdLO8fie0)

.::. Marriage .::.

My Immortal. (We....have a close, but painful relationship, I guess?.... And here I thought Marriages were supposed to be Joyful. :P Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JB5PxVUn1-8)

.::. Going To War .::.

From the Inside. (Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ptqpqMiNzn4)

.::. Night Before Battle .::.

Face Down. (Based on this Song, I display great Confidence & Bravery. :D Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8wvyPDZo_w)

.::. Last Fight .::.

Bring Me to Life. (No! I'm Falling Apart! >.< Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hOvgR_mWGco)

.::. Last Fight Result .::.

Christmas Day. (It ended well!.... I apparently found the Love of my Life. :D Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ukOYxn2xjIw)

.::. Reuniting With Old Friends .::.

Russian Roulette. (So we reunite....And then all but one of us has to leave?! What was the point of even Coming?! But I guess it had to be Done.... Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WbqG_nlFqR0)

.::. Final Words .::.

Foreign Language Song. (I must have been Crazy when I died. That made no sense at all....Oh, well! *Puts Sauerkraut in Lederhosen* Link to Song:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MMjwZAdUwRw)

.::. Funeral .::.

Pain. (Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fksp8J73GUw)

.::. Aftermath .::.

Pictures Of You. (Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2QDyaXa59o)

.::. Ending Credits .::.

Alejandro. (After all that Chaos....And we get this Song? :P Link to Song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vNqIUb2RdGQ)

I had no idea that I listen to so many Depressing Songs....I feel so Accomplished! ^_^

It's a Downward Spiral,
It's a trip to Hell.
It's an Up Hill Battle.
Where we'll end up, we never know.

I've seen people all around me.
Figures white as snow.
With pasts stained in black & frowns they'll never show.

I've seen people stop and listen, when they're not really listenin' at all.
I've seen the mirrors that shattered. The pieces, a distorted image shown.
And I stop & look around me....
Oh where, oh where did life go wrong?

When did the World stop spinning round?
When did the cracks form, and the bodies hit the ground?
When did the sun set? And when did love grow cold?
All these things I ask....Never am I told.

I stopped by the store today, saw a beggar askin' for change.
All the people went walkin' by,
still I believe they wanted the same.

And I saw a kitten born today,
and a baby takin' its first steps,
and I got to thinking, what have I been missing?
Why had I never seen this before?

Well, when exactly did the World stop spinning round?
When did the cracks form, and the bodies hit the ground?
When did the sun set? And when did love grow cold?
All these things I ask....Never am I told.

Well, I'm sittin' on the porchstep listening,
and for the first time, I really see....
Oh, I see the fireflies flyin', and the great big moon.
A child laughing and memory gone too soon.
And then I find myself with tears in my eyes,
'cuz for such a long time I let the world fly by.

And now I sit and hear the noise.
The sirens roaring and the bangin' on a door,
as a few shots are fired & a family is no more....

Oh, and I ask this question to everyone,
when did the story end and why did we come undone?
What's the sense of good if evil has won?

And when did the World stop spinning round?
When did the cracks form, and the bodies hit the ground?
When did the sun set? And when did love grow cold?
All these things I ask....
Oh, all these things I ask, and Never,
Never am I....
told.

(A Poem for my Dad on Father's Day! ^_^)

The blooming rose: the greatest gift of summer, to be certain.
I see it in your eyes, the unveiling of a curtain.
Each breath that you take, every move that you make,
It's pulling you closer to the day that you will wake.

It may seem dreary on such gloomy days;
just remember, the path of tears & sacrifice is the only way.
But it never lasts forever,
No, for all problems eventually become a drifting feather.

Under the light of the moon, under a pile of snow,
is the tiniest flower, waiting to grow.
It struggles and fights,
trying to grasp "what is" and "what might".

But it fights to the surface,
undying, it looks for the sun.
It completes its Metamorphosis;
It worked its way to the top as quickly as a Man on the run.

They say that you find beauty only in roses;
Oh, how they're wrong.
For it's not the rose with so many thorns that I see before me;
No, it's you, the sunflower, that I embrace in my arms.

As the stars turn to sun,
as the silence turns to song,
As the chaotic days pass, don't look back;
Look toward the sun and move forward instead.

A Poem I wrote for my Mommy for Mother's Day! ;D

Roses are Red,
Violets are Blue,
the World is Spinning,
But all I see is you.

The days go by like waves against the shore,
Here I am only loving you more.
I've been given a rose without any thorns.
A rose so beautiful, it makes all the other flowers mourn.

I see your face in the sun,
I see it in the rocks I pass by as I run.
An angel has come to watch over me.
Now tell me, how lucky could I be?

Now I'm looking up at the stars,
telling God just how wonderful you are.
I'm sure you already know, already feel it in your heart,
but I Love You so much that we could never be Apart.